(Written sometime this spring.)
Interviews are the worst. Seriously. Questions like “Why do you want this job?” Ummm, last time I checked, money is pretty essential to survival these days. Unless, you know of a community garden filled with money trees, cause that would work too.
Wait. No. Something’s wrong. Let’s backtrack this.
Yes. Okay. Mmhmm. Yep.
Job hunting in general is the worst. Awful. Frustrating. Punch you in the throat horrible. If you have yet to experience this awfulness, let me just tell you now: it is coming for you, and it will murder all of your hopes and dreams. If you came here looking for some hope and encouragement during your own battle of joblessness and penny pinching misery, you came to the wrong place. There is no hope here. Save yourselves!
Job hunting is a cruel and vicious process, a lesson that reality has forced upon me over these last few months. It’s a roller coaster of emotions. You apply for a job. Hope awakens in that little space in your stomach where butterflies sometimes like to visit. Weeks go by. Tensions rise. That fateful phone call finally comes. You have an interview! Days of preparation. Nerves awakening from their slumber. Tensions and hope swirling, rising simultaneously, like a personal solar eclipse, causing your newly awakened nerves to fly about in confusion like drunk dragons. You nail the interview. (You hope.) Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. The fear and self-doubt begin to set in. Then, finally, another phone call. This is it! You got the job!
“Thank you for applying, but we’ve decided to hire someone else. Good luck with your life!”
Your hopes are crushed. All is doomed.
And then the process repeats for the ten other jobs you applied for.
Like I said: job hunting is the worst.